Donor sperm

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October 19, 2023 @ 5:30 pm – 7:00 pm

For Maryland, Virginia, Pennsylvania and D.C. area patients.
Limit of 15 participants.

Making the decision to move forward with egg donation can be a medical, legal, and emotional shift for all prospective recipients.

This virtual donor recipient support group provides support for individuals and couples who are in various stages of treatment such as those contemplating the choice, embarking on and undergoing treatment to conceive as well as for patients who become parents through such means. The processing of the thoughts and feelings about the use of donated gametes can be very helpful as one prepares to move forward with this option, as well as having support from others who are having a similar experience. It can also be important to the long-term health and well being of the child (conceived) by donated gametes. More specifically, the group affords recipients benefit from exploring any concerns and expressing their feelings about having a child with someone else’s genetic material as well as to discuss when, how, what, to whom, and if to disclose to offspring.

The group is FREE for all participants.

Registration is required at least 48 hours before the group event. An email will be sent to you with a consent form that must be filled before you can attend the virtual group. When you fill out the consent and return it to the group leader via email, you will then receive an invitation with a link to a video meeting. Please note that the group may be canceled if there are too few people registered. The group leader will contact you by phone or email if the group will not be held as scheduled.

For more information, please email Tara Simpson, Psy.D. Please include in your email what doctor, office and state you reside in.

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The decision to create your family with the assistance of third-party reproduction i.e., donor egg, donor sperm, or gestational surrogacy is a difficult one. Choosing this family building option ultimately involves grieving the loss of having a child who is genetically related to both or either of you, and/or grieving the loss of the experience of pregnancy and carrying your child. Once an individual or couple feels comfortable moving forward with third-party reproduction, the next decision involves whether to use a known or unidentified/previously unknown gamete donor or gestational carrier (GC). A known gamete donor or GC is a family member, friend, or acquaintance with whom the recipients or intended parents have a preexisting relationship.
Why Choose to Work With a Known Gamete Donor or GC?
There are numerous reasons why an individual or couple may consider building their family with the assistance of a known gamete donor or GC. First, in the case of egg and sperm donation, if the donor is a relative, there may be a sense of comfort in using gametes with some type of genetic link. A strong familial resemblance between the donor and recipient may also be an important factor in the decision. In a same-sex couple, the assistance of a family member as an egg or sperm donor can also allow for a genetic connection to both members of the couple. Other individuals find solace in maintaining a broad family connection and may wish to work with a brother-in-law as a sperm donor, or a sister-in-law as an egg donor or GC. When we include friends, as well as family members, the preference for a known arrangement may be a matter of trust; there is a perception that the donor or GC will provide greater and more accurate medical, educational and social history. It also creates an opportunity for the donor or GC to be known to the child, develop some form of a relationship with the child, and in the case of gamete donation, for the child to have access to updated health information. Finally, in some situations, the use of a known gamete donor or GC may decrease the cost of and/or the waiting time to receive treatment.
Who is an Appropriate Candidate to Be a Known Gamete Donor or GC? 
First, check with your treating physician to identify basic requirements for a known donor or GC. For example, your medical practice may have established a minimum and maximum age range for gamete donors and GCs. Likewise, most practices require that a GC has previously carried a pregnancy to term and delivered a child. This is related to important medical information obtained when a woman has experienced pregnancy, childbirth, and the postpartum adjustment period, as well as the ability to provide full informed consent since a potential GC cannot anticipate how it would feel to relinquish a child unless she has previously given birth. Before you ask or accept the offer of a family member or friend to help you create your family, you should have an idea of minimum qualifications.
Second, gamete donation and gestational surrogacy requires a significant commitment of time and often, emotional energy, on the part of the donor or GC. Prior to the initiation of treatment, there is usually a medical and psychosocial evaluation process. Speak with your doctor and the practice’s mental health professional to find out exactly what will be required of the donor or GC during the work-up and treatment process. Also be aware of the potential medical and psychological risks (e.g., perceiving the resulting offspring as their own (for donors); difficulty relinquishing the baby (for GCs) of treatment for a donor or GC. Before you decide to ask or accept the offer of a family member or friend to be a donor or GC, carefully consider whether it is realistic for that individual to commit to the process at the current time.
How Do I Ask?  
Obviously, it is far more comfortable for everyone when the friend or family member comes forward and offers to be a gamete donor or GC. Sometimes someone has made an offer in the past or even expressed a general statement such as, “if there is anything I can do to help you…” and thus, they have paved the way for you to now ask for their assistance. However, often there has been no such offer, or you may not even have been open with others about your family building plans or your struggles with infertility. The prospect of asking for such an important gift and the potential that the person will say “no”, can be anxiety-provoking and heighten feelings of vulnerability. What may work best for all parties is to write the proposed donor or GC a letter or email, allowing them and their spouse/partner the time and space to think about the request without feeling the pressure of an immediate response. The letter should make it easy for the potential donor or GC to decline the request. For example, you may include statements such as, “you don’t even need to respond to this if you don’t want to,” or “we understand if this is not something you are interested in pursuing and we just appreciate you taking the time to think about it.” You may wish to let them know other options you are considering e.g., an unidentified gamete donor or identifying a GC through an agency. The letter might also mention that the potential donor or GC could speak with a physician, a member of the donor team, or the practice’s mental health professional to obtain more information prior to making a decision.
It is important to prepare yourself for the possibility that the person you ask, or that person’s spouse/partner, may say “no”, either initially, or after they have had the chance to ask questions of medical or mental health personnel, or even after they have had a number of conversations with you. As mentioned previously, being a gamete donor or GC involves a commitment of time and emotional resources for both the collaborator and his/her spouse/partner and their family. There are also lifelong issues to consider. You only have one family, and good friends are not easily made; you do not want to do anything to harm those relationships. Try to keep in mind that whether the person you asked thought about the possibility briefly or for weeks, the fact is that they care enough about you to have even considered helping you on your journey. 
What Issues Should We Discuss?  
Most clinics require known donors, recipients, GCs and intended parents to participate in a psychosocial counseling and evaluation process with a mental health professional who has an expertise in the area of third-party reproduction. However, it can be helpful for you and your spouse/partner to discuss various treatment and lifelong issues with one another, as well as, with the gamete donor or GC and their spouse/partner, to determine whether this arrangement is the best way for you to create your family. Below are some questions for all parties to consider separately and with one another, regardless of whether the donor or GC volunteered or you asked for their assistance:
  • How might this arrangement affect the relationship between all parties? How may other family members or friends respond to this collaboration?
  • What are everyone’s expectations for treatment? For example, expectations each party has regarding the number of treatment cycles, the disposition of embryos for known gamete donation, and number of embryos transferred for a known GC arrangement, etc.
  • What are all participants’ feelings about whether, when, and how to disclose to a child born from the process? Also, to the children of the gamete donor or GC?
  • What are everyone’s expectations about the future role of the donor or GC in the child’s life (e.g. does the donor or GC desire to have a greater or lesser level of involvement in the child’s life than that with which you are comfortable?)
There needs to be an understanding and consensus on these, as well as other issues, for a known collaboration to be a positive experience for all of the parties, including any children born from the process or existing children.
How Do I Even Begin to Thank My Family Member or Friend for Such a Precious Gift?  
This is a common question and concern among individuals and couples who work with a known gamete donor or GC. Research tells us that friends and family members are usually motivated to help because of their relationship with you and their empathy for the difficulties you have had in achieving parenthood i.e., their motivation is altruistic. We have found that in general, donors and GCs appreciate being thanked. However, planning some type of thank you can also be integral to achieving a sense of closure for all parties. People often think about a “gift” as a means to thank a donor or GC. However, depending on the person and your relationship with them, a thoughtful note, or some type of thank you ritual (e.g., making a donation to a charity of their choice in their honor; an outing, spa day, or special trip) may be a more appropriate gesture.
In summary, building your family with the assistance of a known egg or sperm donor, or gestational carrier has implications for you, the donor or GC, their spouse/partner, and any resulting or existing children in each of the respective families. Taking the time to carefully consider the treatment and lifelong issues better prepares all parties for what can be an emotionally challenging, but rewarding process.
Contributed by: 
Erica Mindes, Ph.D.

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In 2015, the Maryland legislature updated the Maryland Insurance Mandate to allow same-sex couples to use donor sperm, creating an inequality for heterosexual couples needing donor sperm to conceive. However, patients and leaders in the infertility community have advocated to broaden the coverage and, as of earlier this year, the Maryland Insurance Mandate has been expanded to heterosexual couples who need donor sperm to have a child.

Stephanie Beall, M.D., Ph.D., who sees patients in our Columbia and Towson, MD, offices, provided valuable testimony to the Maryland Senate and House of Delegates in January 2016. She spoke on behalf of the Shady Grove Fertility patients who would benefit from and would need assistance of donor sperm to have a baby. Fortunately, her testimony, as along with the fervent advocacy work of organizations like Shady Grove Fertility partner RESOLVE, the National Infertility Association, made a difference.

The Fertility Parity Bill was signed by Maryland Governor Larry Hogan on May 10, 2016.

“It was an honor to work with Senator Kagan and Delegate Hill and give testimony on behalf of the many couples who need to use donor sperm to have a baby in the state of Maryland. By expanding the Maryland Insurance Mandate for fertility coverage, this will create an opportunity for many couples who would otherwise not be able to afford the care they need to have a child.  Now we can help them make their dreams come true,” explains Stephanie Beall, M.D., Ph.D.

Why People Need Donor Sperm

Donor sperm is widely used for same-sex female couples, single women, and couples diagnosed with severe male factor infertility. Of the one in eight couples who experience infertility, up to 10 percent of the patients with male factor infertility may be candidates for using donor sperm.

For men with male factor infertility, there are a number of contributing factors that result in low quantity or poor quality sperm. Some men are simply born without the cells in the testicle that are needed for sperm manufacturing; while others have genetic problems that leave them with no sperm or very little sperm. Of men who do have sperm, there are cases when the sperm may not fertilize or promote good embryo development. In addition, men with cancer who have received chemotherapy often lose the ability to make sperm.

 Why This Change to the Maryland Insurance Mandate is Important

This amendment to the existing Maryland Insurance Mandate creates access to fertility coverage for more patients. An estimated 120,000 couples who live in Maryland will experience infertility—and roughly half of those couples will have male factor infertility. The change to provide coverage for donor sperm enables families who would otherwise be ineligible to use the Maryland Insurance Mandate. Their struggle due to financial barriers may be over.

Maryland is one of just 15 states that have an infertility insurance mandate that requires health insurance plans to offer or provide coverage for in vitro fertilization (IVF) procedures. While this benefit is advantageous to patients who are employed through the state of Maryland, there are some limitations. For example, employers with 50 or fewer employees, or religious organizations whose beliefs conflict with fertility treatment, are exempt from offering this coverage.

The Benefit for Patients

According to Shady Grove Fertility’s Donor Program Director, Michele Purcell, M.H.A., R.N., “This is a huge step forward. In the past, many insurance companies excluded infertility coverage in the event an egg or sperm donor was needed; not allowing for reasons or causes behind the need for donor services. As a result of this exclusion, many patients were forced to stop treatment, or pay 100% out of pocket.”

Paul R. Shin, M.D., a Shady Grove Fertility reproductive urologist and male fertility specialist, also explains why this change is so important, “The prospect of helping couples to achieve their dreams of family building can take many different paths. For the majority of male factor infertility patients who seek their care here at Shady Grove Fertility, those dreams end with a happy healthy baby conceived from the sperm and egg of the male and female partners. However, some men have no sperm and some men with very poor sperm quality can go through an entire IVF cycle and have suboptimal fertilization and embryo development. Without this mandate, the use of donor sperm and the costs associated with uncovered cycles were a significant enough barrier that couples were forced to make a decision based solely on finances, cutting short their dreams of building a family.”

Schedule an Appointment

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Isaac Sasson, MD

When couples are having trouble conceiving, the first instinct for many is to look to the woman for a cause. “The reality is that 40 to 50 percent of all infertility can be contributed to the male partner, making it important to complete a comprehensive semen analysis in addition to testing the female partner.” explains Isaac Sasson, M.D., Ph.D., of the Chesterbrook, PA office. Luckily, advances in fertility treatment over the past two decades have made male factor infertility one of the most treatable forms of infertility.

Simple Test to Determine Male Factor Infertility
A simple semen analysis can provide insight to the overall quality of a male’s sperm. The results can identify infertility and point physicians in the direction of the cause. At Shady Grove Fertility, a specially trained andrologist, using the most recent World Health Organization (WHO) standards for semen analysis, reviews each sample paying close attention to four parameters:

  • Volume: “Semen is made up of sperm, amino acids, sugars,enzymes, and several other secretions made by the male reproductive system.” says Dr Sasson. Ideally there should be at least 1.5 milliliter. If the volume of ejaculate is low, the sample may be lacking in these important components that are critical in reproduction. It may also signal a blockage in the ejaculatory system that can obstruction semen transport.
  • Count: Concentration – commonly referred to as “sperm count” – tells physicians the number of sperm within the semen. A healthy concentration will contain more than 20 million sperm per milliliter. A low sperm count can signal a problem with sperm production. This can arise from a problem in the testicle, the hormones that regulate sperm production, an underlying genetic disorder, or exposure to medication or environmental factors.
  • Motility: Motility refers to the sperm’s ability to move. In a healthy sperm sample, at least 40 percent of sperm are moving. Should the motility fall below this threshold, the ability for the sperm to reach the female reproductive tract and find the egg can be compromised.
  • Morphology: Sperm morphology pertains to the percentage of sperm that are of a normal size and shape. Sperm shape reflects DNA content within the sperm. Abnormally shaped sperm are unable to fertilize an egg or produce a viable embryo. Ideally, more than 4% of sperm should be normal in shape.

Click here to schedule a Semen Analysis>

Read Jeremy’s Story: Infertility from a man’s point of view

Treating Male Factor Infertility

Once male factor infertility is identified, depending on the severity, there are several treatment options available to overcome male factor infertility.

  • Intrauterine Insemination (IUI): This low tech treatment option is used for mild forms of male factor infertility or when using donor sperm. This affordable option can be performed in any  of our full service offices and does not require sedation or anesthesia. Prior to the procedure, an andrologist will wash and concentrate the semen sample keeping only the strongest swimming sperm, which will then be placed directly into the uterus.  The procedure is painless and takes less than 5 minutes to perform. Men can collect at home and women can return their daily routine after the procedure.
  • In Vitro Fertilization with Intracytoplasmic Sperm Injection (ICSI): “When lower tech options are not successful or the male factor is severe the next option to consider is IVF with ICSI which allows a single sperm to be injected directly into the female partner’s eggs inside the embryology laboratory.” explains Dr. Sasson. Depending on the age of the female patient this option can more than double the changes of success seen with IUI resulting in up to a 53 percent delivery rate.

In some rare cases, there will be no sperm in the ejaculate. There are several options to consider when that is the case:

  • Surgical Sperm Retrieval: These are procedure include PESA, TESE, or testicular biopsy. These procedures are done under local or general anesthesia, are not painful, and have a quick recovery. During a PESA/ TESE, a needle is inserted into the testicle and fluid is withdrawn. The fluid is then inspected under a microscope and healthy sperm are extracted from it and used to in the embryology lab to fertilize the retrieved eggs. In rare cases, a testicular biopsy can be performed in which a small sample of tissue is extracted from the testes. The tissue is then inspected under a microscope and any healthy sperm are isolated and used during IVF with ICSI. The surgically retrieved sperm can be frozen and used in subsequent treatment cycles if needed.  These options have proven very successful at helping men with a severe male factor build their family.
Read Jennifer & Mike’s donor sperm treatment story on page 8

Donor Sperm: Donor sperm is also the only option for many single women, women in same sex relationship, and women whose male partner is experiencing severe male factor infertility with no available sperm. Use of donor sperm it is more common that you might have thought. In 2013, at Shady Grove Fertility, approximately  20 percent of all IUI treatment cycles used donor sperm.

“For patients seeking an anonymous donation there are several national certified sperm banks we recommend.” says Dr. Sasson.  When considering donor sperm, the educated consumer should be wary that not all sperm banks are equal. It is recommended that the following screening and protocols have been performed by the sperm bank:

  • Testing for infectious diseases, such as HIV and Hepatitis, prior to collection and again after a 6 month quarantine of the semen.
  • Genetic disease for conditions such as cystic fibrosis and sickle cell anemia.
  • Sperm quality determined by a semen analysis.

At Shady Grove Fertility, we recommend the following certified sperm banks:

When using the sperm of a known donor FDA regulations call for the same screening and quarantine of the semen prior to use.

To learn more about male factor infertility and the available treatment options call one of our knowledgeable new patient center liaisons to schedule a consultation with one of Shady Grove Fertility’s physicians, please call 877-971-7755 or click here to schedule an appointment.

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CNN Story Recap: A family from Iowa was looking to grow their family through adoption when they heard about embryo adoption. Intrigued, they looked into the process, and found that embryo adoption would be a perfect match. Knowing that not all the embryos might result in a healthy pregnancy, the couple decided to put back two embryos. Today, the happy couple is pregnant with triplets.

What is embryo adoption?

In some cases, men and women that have gone through the IVF or donor egg process, might have unused embryos after treatment. In which case, there is a decision to make: freeze and save the embryos for future use, discard the embryos, or donate them.

Is embryo adoption really adoption?

No. In most states, adoption only refers to the placement of a child after birth. Legal agreements are established to oversee the process of embryo donation to help protect the recipient parent’s relationship with the child. However, according to Dr. Paulette Browne of Shady Grove Fertility’s Fair Oaks, VA office, “this is solely dependent on the family law and family judges in each state. This could potentially leave the intended parents unprotected if the genetic parents change their minds in the future.”

Does Shady Grove Fertility allow for embryo adoption?

SGF patients that have unused embryos are welcome to donate them if they no longer would like to store them and do not want to discard the embryos.

SGF does not accept the use of adopted embryos in our laboratories. In addition to the potential legal matters, there is significant screening necessary to use donated/adopted eggs, sperm and embryos. Often times, genetic parents won’t go through the appropriate screening because at the point in time in which the embryos were created, they themselves were the intended parents.

Egg donors and sperm donors go through extensive screening to ensure the health of any resulting child as well as the woman carrying the pregnancy.  This screening is required by law.

Would you like to learn more about embryo adoption?

If you are interested in placing your embryos for adoption, please contact the National Embryo Donation Center or Night Light’s Snowflakes® Program.

If you would like to schedule an appointment to discuss your fertility treatment options, please speak with one of our New Patient Liaisons at 877-971-7755.

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We asked our physicians, “What are the questions you get from patients about using donor sperm?” Here are the most frequently asked questions – and answers – about selecting and using donor sperm.

Where can I buy donor sperm?

Shady Grove Fertility recommends that patients only get donor sperm from FDA approved cryobanks, such as Fairfax Cryobank and California Cryobank.

How do I choose the donor?

Selecting a donor is a very personal choice. You will be provided with information such as height, eye and hair color, blood type, education level, areas of study, ethnicity and religion to help you select the right donor for you. Sometimes, you may be provided with photos.

Can I have a male friend by my donor?

Yes, but known donors must complete the same screening as an anonymous donor. The process to screen the donor takes 6 to 9 months prior to the start of treatment which includes testing and a quarantine period.

What kind of sperm should I request?

Donor sperm is often available as “washed” or “unwashed”. We will accept the sample either way and prepare it as needed for insemination.

What are the different types of insemination and how do they work?

If no female infertility is present, you may do a non-medicated insemination. You will be inseminated at the most optimal time of your menstrual cycle for conception. If the non-medicated treatment is not successful or there is an identified female infertility issue, then more advanced methods such medicated IUI (intrauterine insemination) and IVF cycles can be used to achieve a pregnancy.

– Read “Making a Baby: It Takes Two”

Do I need to complete any testing prior to treatment?

Yes. All patients are required to complete an infertility work-up to help determine the best course of treatment.

How much does donor sperm cost?

Cost varies by the cryobank, typically ranging from $225 to $700.

How much does the insemination cost?

A non-medicated insemination will cost approximately $375.

Are there any risks associated with donor sperm?

No. The FDA has strict requirements including a six-month quarantine to allow the donor to be tested for infectious diseases prior to and post-donation. These rules are in place to keep the recipient of the donated sperm safe.

What and how do I tell my child about his or her father?

It is your choice to share as much or as little as you would like with your children. Shady Grove Fertility offers group discussions for patients, offering a safe environment to discuss your options with social workers and other patients that have also achieved parenthood through donation. To learn more about these groups please call Carol Toll, LCSW-C at 301-924-5124 or Patricia Sachs, LCSW-C at 301-951-0206. You may also visit our complete support group and discussion calendar at https://www.shadygrovefertility.com/calendar.

If you are interested in building a family through donation, please schedule an appointment, or speak with one of our New Patient Liaisons at 877-971-7755.

Content provided by: Dr. Barbara Osborn and Dr. Simon Kipersztok

2026 Shady Grove Fertility

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