Jessica & Brian

How we met

Brian and I met during my freshman year at Penn State in January 2001. Brian was a year older than me. We ended up becoming friends who enjoyed PSU sports, music, and hanging out together. We went our separate ways when we graduated but remained in touch and occasionally visited one another. It wasn’t until I had a pancreatic tumor in 2011 that I rethought my life and realized Brian was not only a good friend, but my soulmate. We soon began dating long distance and I eventually moved to Maryland. Shortly after my move, were got engaged and had a beautiful wedding on June 27, 2015 at our alma mater, Penn State.

Trying to conceive

Being a Special Education Elementary Teacher, I love helping children and always wanted to be a mom as well as an educator. Brian and I began trying for a baby about four months after our wedding. Four months of trying and we were pregnant. Brian and I were so excited. However, at my first ultrasound (at 8 weeks), the baby was measuring 3 weeks behind and there was no heartbeat. Two days later, I began miscarrying. This was the hardest thing I had to go through. I became very anxious, and it took me a while to heal emotionally. And all the while, we kept trying and weren’t getting pregnant again. When it finally was about a year of trying without any success, I begged my gynecologist for a referral to Shady Grove Fertility. I just knew something wasn’t right. I was also tired of being told we got pregnant once and miscarriages happen. I was tired of doing the same thing with no results. So finally, on January 18, 2017 we had our first appointment with Dr. Osheroff at the Columbia, MD office.

Meeting Dr. Osheroff

Dr. Osheroff was very knowledgeable and honest, and agreed that we needed some help to move things along. After our testing, we found out Brian had a morphology issue with his sperm and that trying on our own gave us a 2-4% chance of getting pregnant. We were surprised by this, but Brian remained so upbeat. We decided to start with intrauterine insemination (IUI). We did this twice and the second time resulted in a chemical pregnancy. This wasn’t the result we wanted and it was very frustrating. I worried we’d never get to be parents, but also felt we were in good hands. Dr. Osheroff was so kind and just as upset (I’d say even more so) and decided to test us for recurrent miscarriage, then proceed with in vitro fertilization (IVF). Luckily, everything came back normal and we decided to do an IVF 5-day fresh transfer.

Starting IVF treatment

I was a little anxious about having to give myself shots, but somehow, I did it! I was lucky that I am a high responder to meds and did not need a lot of hormones. Also, there are videos that you can watch that walk you through it. I am a visual learner, so the videos were awesome and a major help! And the pain wasn’t bad at all. I would reward myself with a small dessert every night after my shots.

The egg retrieval

Dr. Malik did our egg retrieval at the Rockville office on August 28, 2017. I had 23 eggs and 22 were mature! I was so excited about this number. We did intracytoplasmic sperm injection (ICSI) to fertilize the eggs, as this would give us the best chance for successful fertilization. Despite ICSI, only 11 eggs were fertilized. This number amazed me and I knew IVF was going to be our best chance of having a baby.

Out of those 11, only 2 made it to day 5–one we transferred and one we froze. Transfer day was September 2, 2017, Labor Day Weekend!

Dr. Doyle performed the transfer on a very cool, rainy day. The weather reminded me of my wedding day, and I knew that was a good sign. So were the numbers, 28 and 2; my birthday is February 28 (2/28). And I was right!! We got a positive beta. Our second beta showed great growth and then we had our 6-week ultrasound. This was scary because the last time I had one, it didn’t go very well.

Luckily, this was not the case! Also, I will say the 2-week wait was really hard, and so was the first trimester due to my past experiences and anxiety.

The highs and lows

The highs were the great medical professionals and the other couples I met during the group counseling sessions I attended. I also reconnected with a few friends who I found out were going through infertility as well, and I found so many people on social media documenting their journey which really helped me.

My husband and I also grew together during this process. I learned how strong we were. Infertility changed me, but I think for the better. It allowed me to be more compassionate, be more understanding, and become more knowledgeable about infertility. This journey showed me how strong I am and how much I wanted to be a mom.

The lows were the miscarriage and chemical pregnancy, as well as my own emotions and anxiety. But I tried my best to relax and stay positive. I had a great pregnancy without any complications and a smooth labor and delivery. On May 21, 2018, I gave birth to our rainbow baby, Anthony Joseph. He is a healthy 2 month old now! There are times I still think it is a dream!

Remaining hopeful

My husband was my rock and helped me stay positive. When I didn’t think we’d get our baby, he would always say we would in time. I found the patient stories so helpful and that is why I am sharing my story, so I can be a glimmer of hope to others.

I also prayed a lot– I am Catholic and wore precious metals that I had bought at the Vatican on our honeymoon for my sister who was going through infertility. She wore them every day until her son, my nephew, was born. Then she told me to wear them and I did. Now, I am saving them in case one of us wants to try again or to give to our children if they should need it.

The Shady Grove Fertility staff gave me hope. Every person I interacted with was so upbeat and understanding. It was comforting to have such support during this trying time. SGF really does care about their patients! I also want to thank Dr. Osheroff and nurse Kim. They were a great team and without them, I wouldn’t have my amazing son. Thank you!

Advice to future patients

I would tell future patients that parenthood is a journey. We are all on this journey and you have to believe, no matter how long or hard it is. The journey is worth it. I also highly recommend attending the support groups offered by SGF. It is good to talk and share with others who are going through infertility as well. Finally, believe in your care team and believe in your dream. Don’t ever give up! You are at a great place with doctors, nurses, and staff who are working hard and truly want you to succeed. Remember, the greater your storm, the brighter your rainbow.