An anonymous couple shares their inspiring fertility journey and experience having their miracle baby through SGF’s Donor Embryo Program:
Trying to Conceive
My husband and I felt the Lord calling us to have another child. Having had a vasectomy in the past, he waited 6 months to get in with the most successful specialist in our area to perform the reversal. It was successful and we were elated! Since I got pregnant with my first child so quickly, I went out and bought a whole bunch of maternity clothes. Months went by, and we still weren’t pregnant.
Months quickly turned into years. We tried Clomid and Letrozole (Femara). Making love was now a chore that revolved around ovulation tests and my cycle. Fervent months of praying turned into weariness. Deep sadness was growing in my heart. My cycles stopped. I finally scheduled an appointment with my OB/GYN, who revealed I was in premature menopause.
We were in shock and disbelief! I was too young, and we had felt God calling us to pursue another child. We had never grieved so much. How could this be? How could you feel called to do something and it doesn’t turn out? Maybe we had heard Him wrong.
Friends suggested we adopt overseas or domestically. Although they had good ideas, we had felt called to be pregnant and nurse our baby. That was no longer an option.
After a few months, my husband seemed to accept everything, which made it harder for me at times. It was difficult to rejoice when friends were getting pregnant. I wept every time I saw a pregnant woman or a new baby. More time went by and I was finally able to give it over to the Lord. My heart eventually grew softer and more settled. Joy was returning, sprinkled with bouts of crying when I saw a pregnant woman or little babies, but I was no longer bitter. My husband and I were thankful.
Months later, when the thought of having another child was no longer at the forefront of our minds, I came across an article in a magazine. The topic was embryo donation. What!? This got my attention! We had never heard of such a thing. My husband and I found out that sometimes when a couple goes through IVF and has remaining embryos left, they can elect to donate those embryos to another patient(s) in hopes they might be born one day.
Coming to Shady Grove Fertility
Years earlier, I had some prior contact with Shady Grove Fertility when I was researching IUIs and other treatments. SGF was nationally recognized for their fantastic success rates and they were always coming up in Google searches. It seemed like a great place for us to start!
We contacted SGF and learned more about their Donor Embryo Program. Next, my husband and I had a phone consultation with an amazing doctor who explained that being a Donor Embryo Recipient was a great option for us even though I was in premature menopause. We didn’t feel called to use my husband’s sperm with a donor egg. The doctor went on to explain that after a few months of shots, the placenta would take over producing the hormones needed to sustain the pregnancy. How amazing!
My husband and I prayed and talked a lot. We sought counsel from friends and our pastors. They thought this was a perfect fit for us! We were both excited and nervous. We traveled to Shady Grove Fertility to go through the mandatory counseling. This was very helpful. The therapist asked important questions, brought up valid points and really walked along side of us. She had asked if we thought about ethnicity. It felt weird thinking of those things because any ethnicity would be a gift. My husband’s preference was our ethnic mix. I must admit, I didn’t think that would be an option.
Then, we were able to look at the anonymous donor embryo profiles. It was a little uncomfortable looking through the profiles, but at the same time, very heartwarming to see these patients who had struggled for so long, spent so much financially and LOVED so amazingly! And then there it was–our perfect match! God had answered my husband’s desire! We both knew these were meant for us and we agreed right away.
Even though I was deathly afraid of shots, it really wasn’t an issue. Icing for 10 minutes prior made it bearable and since there was no other way for me to become pregnant, I accepted it. The shots became our little “date.” My husband and I would put on the same song, pray for our baby, give thanks for the donor and he’d administer the shot.
Transfer Day and the Two-Week Wait
We took off of work and traveled to SGF for the transfer. The doctor and nurses were amazing! The procedure was fast and painless. Then came the two-week wait. It was horrible! I am the most impatient person, and this felt like torture. My worry was at an all-time high. Every tinge, cramp or “symptom” led me to a Google search. That only increased my anxiety. So, we started taking walks daily and found other things to keep our minds occupied.
Our Little Miracle
Then came the day we had been waiting for. It was a rainy day when the nurse called to tell me we were pregnant. My husband was out in the shed. When I got off the phone, I began jumping up and down, crying and screaming. I waved for him to come over. As he looked at me, I gave him a thumbs up and he came running over to hug me. We were so thankful!
My pregnancy went smoothly. My husband and I cried every time we got to see our little one on the ultrasounds. What a comfort and a joy to see that little beating heart! It was such a treat to get to feel her kick and squirm inside of me. Labor and delivery went smoothly. My husband and I cried so hard when she was born. She was and is perfect in every way! We feel incredibly blessed. Every day is such a joy and everything she does is just the sweetest thing. We just marvel over our SGF miracle. Our love for her is unmeasurable! There is no difference in our love and affection between our children! We treasure them equally and they are the best of friends!
Our Thank You to the Donor Embryo Program
The journey the Lord took us on was not the route we thought it would be. It was even better! We are now very thankful that my cycles stopped and that I hit premature menopause. We are thankful He closed every door just to open this one!
To us, our donor and all the embryo donors in this program are heroes! Our daughter has a unique story of incredible, amazing, selfless love!
We feel that SGF’s Donor Embryo Program is a “win-win” situation. The donors who fought so hard and long, are happy that the remaining embryos can be donated, thawed and have a chance at being born. My husband and I, who tried for so long to get pregnant, received that amazing gift! We are forever grateful to SGF and God!
A Note from My Husband
At first, I did not want to go this route of being an Embryo Donor Recipient. I was angry that after undergoing a painful, yet successful surgery and trying for years, we still couldn’t have our “own” child. Then God changed my heart. My wife and I were on the same page going into this. I can’t begin to tell you the love I have for my daughter! I too am so thankful the Lord chose this way! I can honestly say I wouldn’t want it any other way.
For more inspiration, read through more of our heartwarming patient success stories: here.
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